Thanks to your familiarity with modern automobile alarm systems and being buddies with the local security guard, you are the proud owner of a Bentley. Most people would take this opportunity to joy ride, but since you're clearly a connoisseur of the most discerning taste, that's not going to work for you. Instead take this opportunity to outfit that awesome example of automotive design and engineering with one of our Bentley cargo & trunk liners.
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Perhaps the judge will knock some years off when you show him that this has been a mission of mercy. After all, subjecting your Bentley to wear and tear simply because you haven't bothered to install one of our Bentley cargo & trunk liners, from at AutoAnything, is just cruel and unusual punishment. Try that pitch and tell us how it works out.